There are many conversations we may find difficult but right now the one that appears to be very apt at my age, with ageing parents and the concerns it can bring, is the dreaded open conversation about death.
What will happen when you die?
What do I need to know?
Have you signed a LPA (Lasting Power of Attorney)
Where is your Will?
What do you want to happen to your estate?
Is your Will up-to-date?
Do you have any specific requests for your funeral?
What are your thoughts on DNR (Do Not Resuscitate)?
How many of you are reading this and are clear about all the answers to the questions above regarding a parent or surviving family member?
I ask because it appears these conversations are not taking place when we are all coherent, with our full faculties and of sound mind so that we can all relax in the knowledge, when the dreadful day arrives we are all contented with what happens next with no misunderstandings
Is it time we made these conversations a priority? If we did, we could avoid any confusion, additional distress and upset, and in the case of many blended families it can help avoid any unnecessary shocks because the Will was not written or had not taken the new family configuration into consideration.
If we want to ensure in death our wishes are carried out we do need to start talking, planning and communicating and not just hoping all will be well. As time and experience has taught me over the years, and conversations with solicitors, if you don’t sort out your estate, your children or relations may not receive want you had imagined or expected.
And as someone who is in their 50’s I think it’s important you make it clear to all your children what you have decided. And for complete transparency why not give your children a copy of your Will?
Why is death such an awkward subject? We’re all going to die and if we do have an estate, any savings, or material processions that we would like gifted in a certain way, why don’t we say, implement and ensure this is all taken care of, and then we can all relax and focus on living.
I think it’s time uncomfortable conversations became conversations that provided comfort. How about you?